It’s the Funniest Thing….

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It seems the moment I committed to producing more, better content on my blog…..my mind went blank. Is that Murphy’s law, or some other kind of law, you think?  I have been totally uninspired to write this whole past week.  Even though things are going swimmingly as far as my self care – as of yesterday, my doctor’s scale tells me I’ve lost 15 pounds!  Yay for me!

So, I guess I could write about my weight loss!  What have I been doing? Dieting? Nope, not at all.  For the past few months, I’ve been doing a 5 – 8 minute weight training regime first thing in the morning, followed by about 20 minutes of Qi Gong.  I found this weight training regime right here .  I’ve added a few things to it, so it’s a bit more than 5 minutes, but I started doing it because I thought to myself, well, I surely can do 5 minutes, right?

But, I think it’s more than just exercise, honestly.  For a very long time, I’ve had the sense that until I began to love my own body…until my body actually felt safe enough,  I would never lose the weight I wanted to lose.  So (and I’ve written about this, as well, on here), I began to physically tell and show my body that I loved it.  I began to do this with touch, and with my own visualizations, several times a week.  I began to constantly remind my body that she was loved, and that she was safe.  As I’ve said before, no one ever told me or showed me how to do this.  I just began to sense within myself that it was the next step in my self care regime, and just decided to start doing it on my own.

Imagine my surprise, then, when recently, during the WISH summit, I listened to an audio interview from Jon Gabriel of The Gabriel Method .  Jon’s premise is that weight loss is a mind-body thing, and that if the body does not feel safe, it will hold on to weight.  He has comprised a whole system, including visualization (which I’ve already been doing!!) to create safety for our body in several different ways.  I was amazed at what he said, and it resonated deeply with me.  I have recently purchased his Total Transformation package, and am in the process of reading his book and using his visualizations.

Jon’s ideas made complete sense to me.  And already doing what he says needs to be done, without even knowing about his ideas till quite recently, well, I’ve lost 15 pounds!

While this sounds like an advertisement, it is certainly not meant to be.   And I get nothing for sharing these links with you. You are welcome to check out his website if it interests you.  I’m talking about this because my own inner sense of knowing understood that I will never, ever lose weight if I’m constantly hating myself.

In the beginning of doing these exercises on myself, I kind of had to ‘fake it till I make it‘.  I was not honestly happy with my body, not at all.  But as I began to do these things several times a week, consistently, not giving up, something began to shift inside me.  I began to realize all that my body has been doing for me, every single second, every single minute of every day….to keep me functioning and healthy.   Even in the midst of all my blatant abuse of my own health, my body has kept on keeping on…

And you know what?  I began to apologize to my own body.  Yes, I did.  Because I realized my body has been fighting against my abuse of her, my whole life.  I began to feel genuinely sorry that I had not treated her well, at all.  And in feeling genuinely sorry, I believe I began to ‘wake up’ to what I was doing.  That ‘waking up’ has caused me to be aware of what I put into my mouth, more often.  It is happening gradually…it has not changed overnight.  But I have actually become more aware of how my body feels when I feed her certain things. I began to feel what she has felt like all these years when I stuff her with all the wrong kinds of food…

And, my desire to feed her more healthy foods has grown out of this.  Also, my desire to move my body has increased.  And while there are still days that I’m not doing my best, I no longer beat up on myself.  Instead, I just get right back to being intentional about my health.

So much has changed, just in these past few months.  And I cannot help but feel it has begun to change with my realization that I can no longer afford to berate myself.  Those days must stay behind me, if I am to move forward with my own self care.  True Love for my own body must now accompany me where ever I go…

Re-reading this, it sounds a bit strange, doesn’t it?  I mean, who in their right mind loves on their body, after all?  Well, I do!  And strange or not strange, I believe that listening to my inner self in this regard has been the most important thing I’ve done toward my self care in a long while….

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