It happens so quickly! It sneaks up on me and I don’t see it coming! I’ve been sidetracked…
Interesting observation, though. Everything was going swimmingly when my life was just so – predictable – seemingly back on track from the hectic time of the fall. But then, I was asked to housesit, and, while I don’t mind housesitting at all, the change in the routine I was just establishing affected my intentions somewhat…
It was the same with school. Before school started I was doing well in my self care routine. But during the weeks in school, everything really important to me seemed to get left behind.
I’ve been housesitting for almost two weeks, with two weeks to go..and I’m consciously starting to get myself back to taking care of self again. Getting to bed on time. Exercising first thing in the morning, when I get up. Eating well again. So, for the first two weeks of being in a new environment, I didn’t do that well. But I’m getting back on track, which is good.
I guess I would like to get to a place where my self care plan stays in place no matter what. I’m sure that IS possible…isn’t it?
Been thinking today, too, about how I ‘settle’. Always settling for second, third, fourth, even last best. Not happy with myself around that, at all. I deserve better. I am WORTH more than that. There it is. My Word Of The Year. WORTH. When will I stop settling, and really begin to believe I am worth more than last best?
Funny thing (although not that funny, really) I grew up believing that there was no room for self. I was taught that my priorities should be GOD, OTHERS, then SELF. I don’t believe that anymore. If we are not looking after ourselves, and always putting others first, then I don’t believe we can give from a place of quality. So, for me, the above phrase reads GOD, (because, yes, God is a huge part of my life) SELF, and then OTHERS. Not everyone will agree with me, but that’s ok, too.
I don’t settle in everything, though. I refuse to settle when it comes to relationships, friendships, the support I have around me. I know when I need to have time alone, and am selfish about making sure I have that. I recognize when my internal self needs extra care – whether that be prayer, meditation or journalling, and I’m pretty good about giving myself what I need in that regard. I’ve done enough internal work to know what I need to stay healthy in that way….
I’m happy with my inside life. I love who I’ve become on the inside.What I really want is to have my outside life mirror my inside life. That’s my goal…not sure why it’s so darn hard to get there…….